private to TAFKAMH

B: twas lovely to hear your voice the other night, but when i tried to call back, i got a couple rings and then no machine or voice mail. try me again? love you-- C edit: can't believe i did this, but since you and my brother both insist on blockin yer myspace blogs, i put up a damn page there. sign of the f'in apocalypse. took me about five minutes to accidentally find a couple ex-boyfriends i really didn't want to see... kindly send me yer name or whatever there so i can stop poking around?

balls

just when i think i've heard it all, here come neuticles! i'm still holding out hope that this is a joke...

grown-up thoughts

florida was a blast... didn't take many pictures (again) other than at the ponce inlet lighthouse. see 'em here. tales from the trip later. woke up yesterday with two full, grown-up thoughts in my head: i need to work more, and i shouldn't take the whole month of march off as planned. in general, the most in my brain when i wake is "what time is it? & do i have to be anywhere today?" so these thoughts took me quite by surprise, and further, i figured i should take them seriously. so since then i've been stressing, job-browsing, and doing financial math. thinking about borrowing enough from C to take some classes in the spring, at the very least. put up a roomie ad today, which i wasn't planning to do for a couple months. applied for a seasonal job or two. i'd been thinking i'd skate by for another few years, line up a semi-real job and be in the swing of it by the time i turn 40. (odd that i had no trouble picturing or handling 30, but 40 just doesn't seem possible.) now, though... i'll likely need to replace the car and the laptop within the year, not to mention the remaining dental work, and the week away as always made me want to move, which leads again back to the school thing. obstacle in common: money. perhaps it's finally time for me to act like a grownup. bah humbug.

back to florida

made it to florida safely... flights all on time, priceline car was waiting for me (actually i got to pick from among several) with no hidden fees. the hotel is exactly as described EXCEPT for a major internet snafu, which has been mostly solved, though not until after i didn't have time to get my damn work done. ah well. last night i was beat, had a drink in the hotel bar (no one else there, no smoking allowed, bartendress was nice & from new orleans, so we traded "the bars close WHEN?" stories...) then walked to a chain restaurant for food & had a server w/a good bar reco, but by the time i was done eating, i was beat from the travel day. inexplicably paid out the nose for a hotel movie & fell asleep before it was over. ah well. it's only money, right? today was eaten by the internet problem and the search for milk for my coffee. yes, there are shops everywhere here in tourist central, but for some reason orlando is against U-turns, so getting back becomes a hassle. no worries, just a time-sucker. this afternoon i finally went for a trail ride at horse world stables... hadn't been on a horse in way too long, so i would've taken whatever i could get, but it actually was nice. an hour plus, sweet guide, and luck of the draw had me up front. my horse unfortunately tripped repeatedly when we were trotting-- i lost count after six-- and if it had been my first time on a horse, i would've been scared shitless. (we didn't get to pick our horses.) his name was TJ, and though he was sweet, he was thus far my least favorite horse i've ever ridden. (though he had a lot to live up to.) now i must call gun range boy before he gives up on me and makes other plans for the night. wish me luck... (by the way-- it was almost 80 here today. i could used to this...)